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Don't get stuck in your own way

paul martinelli serving Aug 16, 2019

I’m just sitting here thinking about how people are funny! Not in a “ha ha” way, necessarily… but in a way that makes me think, “hmmmm, isn’t that interesting.”

Sometimes we get our minds set on a certain idea. We hear something from somewhere about what we can do to further ourselves and to further our growth. And we filter the idea through our current beliefs and programming, and might I suggest, we put our own little spin on it based on our own perceptions. And this spin might just end up throwing the whole thing off, and distorting the original purpose of such an idea.

What am I talking about, you might be asking?

Well, let me give you an example, because I think there’s a lesson here for all of us.

If you’ve been in the personal development realm for any amount of time, you might’ve heard this idea… that one of the ways you can grow and one of the ways you can increase your connection to those who can help you grow, is to reach out to someone you consider a mentor, someone who has gone through the growth journey and who is at a different level of awareness and a different level of results in their own life, someone that you seek to learn from… and to go to them and to offer to help them in any way that might be of service to them.

It sounds like a good idea, doesn’t it! It makes sense. The first law of receiving is to give, right? Yes, indeed!

To truly and deeply receive good in your life, you need to operate from a place of authentic giving. As Thomas Troward speaks about in The Spirit of Opulence, you must live as a “center of distribution.”

And the giving can take place on different realms in many different ways in your life. “Giving” doesn’t just mean financial giving. You can give your time, you can give your talent, you can give your treasure.

There are lots of ways to contribute to this world, to give of yourself, which, in turn,  leads to growing yourself.

So, a few months ago, somebody emailed me and told me that God had laid it on their heart to reach out to me and to ask me if there was anything at all that they could do to be of service to me and to the work that I am doing.

In response, I did what I have learned to be the best thing to do. I took them at face value.  I declared noble intent on their part. And I decided to take them up on their offer. With the management of the John Maxwell Team, as well as running Empowerment Mentoring alongside Roddy and Susan Galbraith, there’s a lot going on, and at that particular moment, I could think of a few things that this person could pretty easily help us with. It wasn’t anything too major or time-consuming or demanding, but some small tasks that our core team just didn’t have the time to take on.

I responded to this person and thanked them for their generous offer, and I told them that ‘yes, I could certainly use their help in a couple ways.’  And I went on to explain these fairly straightforward projects with which we could use some help.

You know, it was comical when I received their response…. Well, “no,” this wasn’t exactly what they had in mind, and actually they could help me in this ONE very limited way, and would I like to take them up on it. That was it!

I read the email a couple times because I wanted to make sure I was reading it correctly. So, this person reached out to offer their help in “any way” that might be of service to me. And then when I actually agree to take them up on their offer, they do some major back-peddling and restrict what their original offer was.

My question is, what was really the point in reaching out in the first place?

To be perfectly frank, the whole thing just turned into a major waste of time for me, because their very narrow and restricted offer really wasn’t of any use to me. So why didn’t they tell me these restrictions in the first place?

Look, I know we all have our own agenda. It’s how human beings work. We are all looking to get our needs met in one way or another. It’s just the way it goes. This person had their own agenda, just like I have my own agenda, and you have your own agenda. 

But let me recommend that you do not disguise your agenda to be something that it’s not. If I’m going to reach out to someone that I want to serve because I know they are in a position for me to learn from, I’m going to do ANYTHING to make that relationship work in a harmonious way.

When I first proposed to John Maxwell that we launch the John Maxwell Team, and he told me exactly what he needed, my only question for him was, “is there anything else?”

I didn’t try and negotiate. I knew that this was required to move me closer to my dream, and I’ve learned that if I try to negotiate with my dream, then I will probably lose it.

There are going to be people along your journey that you will need to give to, that you will need to serve. These will be people who haven’t walked as far as you on the journey of personal growth, who need your help and your support, and these will be people who have walked further than you, who you will need to learn something from through the process of giving and serving them.

And if you do not live into this truth, and if you let your own preconceived notions of what it means to serve get in your way of truly serving, then you will never learn the lessons you need to learn.

What I have learned is that to grow and to progress, I need to be an open book. I need to allow different ideas and different perspectives to permeate my being and I need to entertain and explore these ideas before I even consider dismissing them. Otherwise, I will continue to remain trapped in my own programming which has created the conditions and circumstances of my life up until now.

Take that and chew on it a little. Where in your life do you need to open yourself up to new ideas and new perspectives? ….Probably in more places than you might think.

I believe in you and I believe in your dream!!

Hold Your Image!!



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